Life has a funny way of taking us places we never planned to go. Much like Elphaba in Wicked, who sings her defiant and empowering anthem "Defying Gravity", we all face moments where we must rise above expectations, defy the odds, and discover our own strength. For me, those moments came in ways I never imagined—moments that turned my world upside down but ultimately taught me to soar in ways I hadn’t thought possible.
At 42, my life took an unexpected turn. I lost my job, a career I’d poured years into, and suddenly, I was faced with a future I hadn’t planned. As if that wasn’t enough, I also became the guardian of my two nephews, stepping into a role I never anticipated. My days were filled with school runs, homework help, and trying to figure out how to create stability for them in the midst of my own uncertainty.
And just when I thought I was beginning to find my footing, life threw me another curveball: my fourth cancer diagnosis. It was a moment that could have crushed me. I had to learn to live within my “new normal” and to acknowledge the physical and mental limits that came with treatment and recovery. Tasks I once did effortlessly now required careful thought and pacing. It was a humbling and often frustrating adjustment, but it also forced me to see life from a different perspective.
Like Elphaba, I realized I had two choices: to stay tethered to the disappointment and fear that threatened to hold me down or to embrace the strength within me and rise above it.
Here’s what I learned about defying gravity in my own life:
Letting Go of Expectations: I had to release the idea of the life I thought I’d have. My career, my independence, and even my physical abilities looked different than I’d imagined. But letting go wasn’t about giving up; it was about creating space for something new.
Owning My Story: I learned to own my struggles and my resilience. Cancer doesn’t define me, but it’s a part of my journey. Becoming a guardian wasn’t in my plan, but it became one of my greatest joys. Every twist and turn added to the story of who I am today.
Taking Small, Brave Steps: Defying gravity doesn’t always mean dramatic leaps. Sometimes, it’s the little steps—like asking for help when I need it, prioritizing my health, or choosing to keep going when it feels easier to stop—that matter the most.
Elphaba may have decided to “fly solo” in her journey, but I’ve learned that having a community, even if it’s just one person, can make all the difference. For me, that person is my best friend.
He’s been there through every high and low, always just a phone call or a short drive away. Whether it’s offering a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, or a much-needed hug, he’s been my rock. His unwavering support—mentally, emotionally, and even financially at times—reminds me that I don’t have to face life’s challenges alone.
Your community doesn’t have to be big. It could be a family member, a friend, or even a supportive online group. What matters is knowing you have someone to lean on when the weight of the world feels too heavy.
In the midst of challenges, I’ve also found moments of joy and magic. It’s the laughter of my nephews as we watch a movie together for the hundredth time. It’s a quiet walk in nature, reminding me of the beauty still surrounding me. It’s the small victories, such as finishing a task I thought I couldn’t do, or having the energy for a full day without feeling drained. These moments remind me that even when life doesn’t look like the story I planned, it can still hold wonder and joy.
If you’re navigating your own unexpected turns, I want to encourage you to embrace your inner Elphaba:
Let Go of the things that weigh you down, whether it’s fear, doubt, or old expectations.
Own Your Story, imperfections and all—it’s what makes you unique.
Take a Brave Step, no matter how small, toward the life you want to create.
And most importantly, don’t be afraid to lean on your community. Whether it’s one person or an entire team, having someone in your corner can make all the difference.
As Elphaba sings, “Something has changed within me, something is not the same. I’m through with playing by the rules of someone else’s game.”
We all have moments when life goes off script. But those moments are also opportunities to defy gravity, to rise above the chaos, and to discover the strength and resilience within ourselves.
So, what’s holding you back? What step can you take today to embrace your story, defy the odds, and soar?
You’ve got this—and you’re not alone in the journey.
I’d love to hear your story. Have you faced a moment when life went off script? How did you embrace your inner Elphaba? Share in the comments—I can’t wait to hear how you’re defying gravity!
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